I’ve been suicidal most of my life. Been inside mental hospitals. Have had years of therapy. I’m done with professional help. It’s never done me any good. A suicidal hotline surely won’t either. The harm I’ve experienced from Choice center and the constant reminder of it through my sister is only the tip of the iceberg of my problems. I’ve struggled with borderline personality disorder my entire life. Experienced severe trauma. Etc etc. I have OCD, ADD, PTSD. And guess what? I’m getting married in two fucking months and all I can think about is how I’d be better off dead. This forum was a way to vent and maybe get some others to say hey, I went through this too. Yet, all the people on here that say these places are harmless and I’m just living in fear only serve to perpetuate how I always feel crazy and nobody ever believes me, even my own sister. Peace.
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